Sports

The Houston Inferno (10-2) earned their tenth win defeating the Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (4-8) by a score of 118-52. The Inferno got 31 points from the Ravens D and 43 points from superstar quarterback Tony Romo. (Donovan McWho? )

I am seriously considering changing the name of my team from the Spooky Boogeymen to the Sucky Boogeymen… I was resoundingly whupped by the Springfield Bullhawks (9-3) by a score of 79-119. Three 0’s didn’t help the cause at all. With three losses in a row and one more week in the regular season, it will take a minor miracle to get into the playoffs.

The Shelbyville Outkasts (7-5) picked up their fourth win in a row beating the Batavia Bulldogs (5-7) 97-83. QB Drew Brees led the way with 30 points. The Outkasts hold their playoff fate in their own hands… A win next week against the PowerPuff Girls gets the Outkasts into the playoffs as a wild-card team.

The P’burg PrairiePride (6-6) snatched victory from the jaws of, uh, a 87-87 tie with the Kentucky Mad Max (5-7). The PrairiePride got the win by way of tiebreaker… The ‘Pride’s bench outscored the Max bench 46 to 43. Next week will decide whether the PrairiePride or the Mad Max come out on top of the Long Division.

The Peoria OrangeCrush (4-8) knocked off the Foreign Bodies (4-8) by a 74-67 score. With the victory, the OrangeCrush have tied the Bodies and the PowerPuff Girls for next season’s #1 draft seed (i.e. last place in the league).

The Houston Inferno (9-2) dropped their second game of the season, losing to the Batavia Bulldogs (5-6) by a score of 47-55. The Inferno managed to leave 82 points on the bench, including the week’s leading scorer Lee Evans (46 points). Unfortunately, the Inferno also lost Donovan McNabb, the league’s top-ranked quarterback, for the rest of the season due to injury. Sorry Jeff…

The Springfield Bullhawks (8-3) extended their win streak to four games with a 125-107 victory of the Kentucky Mad Max (5-6). The Bullhawks’ success can be summarized easily in just two letters… L.T. The Bullhawks’ last loss came four weeks ago, which was the last time LaDainian Tomlinson scored less than 40 points. Here’s hoping that the Chargers give L.T. plenty of time to rest during the last few weeks of the season…

The Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (4-7) outlasted my Spooky Boogeymen (6-5) for a 63-59 win. ESPN screwed me two weeks in a row… Last week, Mike Bell was benched with little or no mention from ESPN prior to gametime. Result: zero points. This week, ESPN still had Bell listed as Out. Result: 22 points sitting on my bench. Frakkers!

The Shelbyville Outkasts (6-5) knocked off the Peoria OrangeCrush (3-8) by a 84-69 score. Drew Brees and Jamal Lewis had big days for the Outkasts, who have now won three games in-a-row and are making a late run for the play-offs.

The Foreign Bodies (4-7) won a 92-71 victory over the P’burg PrairiePride (5-6). The Bodies had five players in double-digits for the win.

Here are the updated standings after 11 weeks…

NORRIS DIVISION Houston Inferno (9-2) Springfield Bullhawks (8-3) Spooky Boogeymen (6-5) Shelbyville Outkasts (6-5) Batavia Bulldogs (5-6)

LONG DIVISION Kentucky Mad Max (5-6) P’burg PrairiePride (5-6) Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (4-7) Foreign Bodies (4-7) Peoria OrangeCrush (3-8)

Two more weeks, and then we start the playoffs! Good luck everyone. (Except Alan, of course.)

The Houston Inferno (9-1) returned to their winning ways with a 80-75 victory over the Peoria OrangeCrush (3-7). Somehow the Inferno managed to pull out the win despite having one less player in double-digits than the ‘Crush. I believe this win officially brings the magic number to “0” and puts the Inferno into the playoffs.

The Springfield Bullhawks (7-3) ran up the score 157-83 against the Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (3-7) this week. The ‘Hawks have now won three in a row, but I personally think they are peaking too soon, and will be pummeled in the playoffs.

The Batavia Bulldogs (4-6) picked this week to discover some offense and handed my Spooky Boogeymen (6-4) a 95-64 defeat. Willie Parker and Donald Driver had huge games for the ‘Dogs.

The Shelbyville Outkasts (5-5) knocked off the P’burg PrariePride (5-5) by a score of 76-45. Eli Manning let down the ‘Pride with a -2 total this week.

The Foreign Bodies (3-7) took advantage of a weak outing by the Kentucky Mad Max (5-5) with a 96-57 win. The difference was Chad Johnson’s 46 points, which the Max left on the bench after a disappointing performance last week.

Undefeated no more (finally! )… The Houston Inferno (8-1) lost their first game this week, 67-65 to the P’burg PrairiePride (5-4). The PrairiePride are currently enjoying a three-game win streak. The Inferno could have used Rudi Johnson’s 13 bench points this week. I’ve been telling Jeff (owner of the Inferno) for a while now that Donovan McNabb would break his heart by the end of the season. After a disappointing nine point performance last week, Donovan failed to score any points at all this week. Of course, it might have had something to do with the fact that Philadelphia had a bye this week.

In the “Battle of the Bulls”, the Springfield Bullhawks (6-3) defeated the Batavia Bulldogs (3-6) by a score of 133-97. The ‘Hawks only had three players in double-digits this week. Luckily for them, those players scored 26, 40, and 41 points respectively.

My Spooky Boogeymen (6-3) returned to their winning ways with a 96-85 victory over the Peoria OrangeCrush (3-6). Marvin Harrison and Peyton Manning managed to pretty much cancel each other out, so it was up to the rest of my players to outscore the rest of their players for the win.

The Kentucky Mad Max (5-4) won their third game in a row beating the Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (3-6) with a 84-58 score. The Max had five double-digit scorers this week, so they didn’t need the 52 points left on the bench.

The Shelbyville Outkasts (4-5) defeated the Foreign Bodies (2-7) by a score of 98-81. 35 points from QB Drew Brees lead the way for the Outkasts.

Here are the updated standings after 9 weeks…

NORRIS DIVISION Houston Inferno (8-1) Spooky Boogeymen (6-3) Springfield Bullhawks (6-3) Shelbyville Outkasts (4-5) Batavia Bulldogs (3-6)

LONG DIVISION Kentucky Mad Max (5-4) P’burg PrairiePride (5-4) Peoria OrangeCrush (3-6) Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (3-6) Foreign Bodies (2-7)

The Houston Inferno (8-0) remained unbeaten by knocking off the Foreign Bodies (2-6) by a score of 86-53. Donovan McNabb looked human for a change with only 9 points, but 20 points from Bears Tight End Desmond Clark and 23 points from the Ravens Defense more than made up for it.

The Peoria OrangeCrush (3-5) had another high-scoring week to follow up last week’s 141 point effort. Unfortunately, they ran up against the Springfield Bullhawks (5-3) who had a record-setting week (so far), beating the Crush 153-93. The Head Coach position for the Bullhawks let down the rest of the team being the only player slot not to turn in a double-digit performance.

The Kentucky Mad Max (4-4) had a triple-digit day vs. the Shelbyville Outkasts (3-5). The Mad Max won 102-59 behind a 34 point perfomance from QB Michael Vick.

The Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (3-5) won their third game in four weeks with a 66-50 victory over the Batavia Bulldogs (3-5). The Bulldogs left Tom Brady’s 37 points on the bench in favor of David Carr’s -2 points. WTF?!?

Oh, and the Petersburg PrairiePride (4-4) narrowly defeated my Spooky Boogeymen (5-3) 121-75. Move along. Nothing to see here…

This is pretty much how I feel about this week’s fantasy football. (Yes, I lost. How did you guess?)

The Houston Inferno (7-0) continued their winning ways with a 79-62 win over the Shelbyville Outkasts (3-4). Another 30-plus point game from Donovan McNabb lead the way for the red-hot Inferno.

As mentioned above, my Spooky Boogeymen (5-2) lost a close game 82-84 to the Foreign Bodies (2-5). Both teams had a player going in Monday night’s game. Unfortunately, Tiki Barber had a better game for the Bodies than T.O. did for me. I need to start looking around for some trades or shrewd pickups because my Spooky Boogeymen haven’t put a scare into any other teams for quite a while.

The P’burg PrairiePride (3-4) knocked off the Springfield Bullhawks (4-3) in a 112-103 game that wasn’t decided until Monday night. Plaxico Burress’ 17-point performance was the difference in the game, but I gotta say that I’m impressed that the Bullhawks put up a 100+ point game with four Byes and an IR player on their bench.

The Peoria OrangeCrush (3-4) lived up to their name this week and crushed the Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (2-5) by the gaudy score of 141-80. The Crush got a 40 point performance from Peyton Manning as well as 38 points from Hines Ward. That’ll do it.

Finally, the Kentucky Mad Max (3-4) beat the Batavia Bulldogs (3-4) by nine points for a 61-52 win. The Max got steady scoring from each position, although the bench outscored the starters with 67 points.

Here are the updated standings after 7 weeks…

NORRIS DIVISION Houston Inferno (7-0) Spooky Boogeymen (5-2) Springfield Bullhawks (4-3) Shelbyville Outkasts (3-4) Batavia Bulldogs (3-4)

LONG DIVISION P’burg PrairiePride (3-4) Peoria OrangeCrush (3-4) Kentucky Mad Max (3-4) Foreign Bodies (2-5) Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (2-5)

Week 6 is history, as is the offensive coordinator of the Arizona Cardinals after the Cards blew a 20-point second half lead to Da Bears Monday night. More on that game later…

The Petersburg PowerPuff Girls (2-4) blew up this week with a 126 point performance, beating the P’burg PrairiePride (2-4) who had a respectable 91 points of their own. Six of the nine PowerPuff starters had double-digit days, not to mention the 60 points that stayed on the bench this week. The Puffs have won two in a row and go into next week with lots of momentum.

The Springfield Bullhawks (4-2) knocked off the Foreign Bodies (1-5) with a 107-91 victory. Da Defense of Da Bears saved the Bullhawks Monday night with a 22 point performance, making up for the -7 points posted by the Bears’ Rex Grossman. It’s unfortunate (for them) that two teams put up 91 points this week, and both teams lost.

The Houston Inferno (6-0) were tested this week by the Kentucky Mad Max (2-4) but continued their winning ways with a four point 88-84 victory. Although the Max had more consistent scoring, Torry Holt’s 36 point game for the Inferno was too much to overcome.

My Spooky Boogeymen (5-1) barely outlasted the Shelbyville Outkasts (3-3) in an 80-77 win, again due indirectly to the domination of the Bears D in the second half of Monday night’s game. Coming in to Monday night I had a six or maybe seven point lead, but the Outkasts had Edgerrin James of the Cardinals yet to play. The way the Cardinals were playing early in the game, I assumed it would just be a matter of time before Edge scored or broke a long run for big points. Brian Urlacker and the rest of the Bears defense took over the game in the second half, but it still got down to just a single point difference in our game, at least until Brian Urlacker ripped the ball out of Edgerrin’s arms for a fumble that the Bears returned for a touchdown. The fumble reduced James’ point total and cemented the win for me and the Boogeymen. Whew.

And finally, we finish with a game that had absolutely nothing to do with the Bears. The Peoria OrangeCrush (2-4) defeated the Batavia Bulldogs (3-3) 75-58. Both teams featured three starters in double-digits, but each of the Bulldogs’ big three outscored their OrangeCrush counterparts by 5-10 points.

So far this season, I’ve made all the right moves on a week-to-week basis as head coach of the Spooky Boogeymen. I’ve consistently been able to put my best players on the field, and I’ve made some decent pick-ups from the waiver wire. Unfortunately, I’ve sucked as general manager of the Spooky Boogeymen. After a great deal of consideration, I elected to keep headcase Terrell Owens from last year’s team instead of Donovan McNabb, and that decision has finally come back to bite me in the ass. The Houston Inferno, lead by Donovan McNabb, handed the Boogeymen our first loss of the season with a convincing 95-70 victory. The Inferno right now look more like an all-star squad than anything else, fielding a team this past weekend having seven of the starting nine positions ranked no lower than fourth in the league. I’m considering filing a petition with the FTC accusing the Inferno of being an anti-trust monopoly.

The Springfield Bullhawks earned a 1-point victory over the Shelbyville Outkasts 86-85. The Bullhawks had to wait until late in the game Monday night for Javon Walker to catch his last pass for a 63 yard/6 point total putting the Bullhawks over the top.

The Peoria OrangeCrush took advantage of a weak outing by the Kentucky Mad Max for a 78-39 win. The 39 point total ties the PowerPuff Girls for low game score, potentially earning some money back at the end of the season (hypothetically speaking).

Speaking of which, the Petersburg PowerPuff Girls earned their first win of the season this week beating the Foreign Bodies 71-61. Both teams are now 1-4.

The Batavia Bulldogs won a close game against the P’burg PrairiePride 65-62. Kicker Adam Vinatieri was a surprise scratch for the PrairiePride.